Held.

Jehovah Rohi: God, my shepherd.

This is the basis of how I live my life. Some have called it simple, others dimwitted. But in this pattern of life I have found contentment and an assurance that is more baffling than not.

I have found stability and the surest of paths: the ones through which he leads.

I realise that life is complex. There's so much about our individual lives that we don't know, and it becomes a lot more overwhelming when we intertwine it even a little with those of others. It's like a puzzle that we can't wrap our heads around.

And I've learnt to accept that it's alright.

As much as I want to know it all, I don't yet. But I know a day will come when I know even as I am fully known.

Jehovah El roi: The God who sees me.

That day will come.

But it's not today. It might be tomorrow, or even five minutes from now, but in this moment, it isn't.

Regardless, my peace comes from being a sheep. Even when my shepherd gives me people to shepherd, my sanity comes from knowing Jesus holds me steady. I am led even as they are, on a path tested, tried, and well travelled.

For there is nothing new under the sun, and everything is laid bare before him with whom we have to do.

Today, like many days before it, my heart is a bit on the side called 'heavy and unsure'. Unsure, not of the one who holds me, but of the choices I have made.

However, even now I remember:

That he leads me on the path of righteousness for the sake of his name. And though I walk through death shadow's valley, I don't have to fear a thing. Because he holds me.

And today, that is enough.

So, don't be dismayed, beloved. You are held by the one who is your destiny, chance, luck, and fate.

The one who holds the dice and the cards,

and every single footprint of ours

we might have wrongly thought unplanned.

And that, my friend, is the greatest assurance of all.